I was living someone else’s life.

In 2006 I had the epiphany and started the process of embracing my unique and rare ways. I started to see the path that I was supposed to walk down. However, I could not see how to climb out of the pit I was thrown in and chose to stay in most of my life. That is when I went to God. You see I still did not believe in myself enough to know that God has given me all I need to succeed in my destiny. I still did not see my worth in Christ.

What I did, though, was take my mustard sized faith, throw my hands up and tell God to mold me and make me because I had no idea how to do it. I was in the midst of a battle with myself and the enemy was my main cheerleader, tellin’ me to just give it up. I was a mess. I contemplated and tried suicide, gave up ministry, and even had a nervous breakdown. This was all because I did not understand my worth. I did not see my uniqueness or believe that there was a creature as rare as me.

Throwing my hands up was all I had left to do.  Only God could help me. And He did.

During my two year transition period, I watched God perform miracle after miracle in my life. Even through my not so happy marriage; through my depressed state of being; through even my anger at Him, God still worked the miracles because I had thrown my hands ups in expectation that He would do something.

As each miracle occurred, I climbed closer and closer to the top of the ladder and this time when I would slip, because I exercised my faith, God’s grip would not let me fall back into the pit I thrown into and chose to stay in for 34 years. I witnessed myself change before my very eyes and one day I looked in the mirror at a unique and rare creature made by God’s hands.

That day I cried because I knew I was finally changed. I had accepted my path, embraced my destiny! And all I did was throw my hands up.

If you are a woman who knows your path, then this may have just been confirmation for you or encouragement to keep walking it.

This message was specific to the woman who is seeking. The woman who still thinks that she is not worth much to God. The one who just cannot believe in herself